Recently I have been thinking about the deep divide in the U.S. After my last interview with Dr. You and our discussion of feeling rage, sadness, and hopelessness during these times... I decided I needed to look at how I contribute to the divide. In my interview with Dr. You, I brought up how I believe that self compassion, and compassion in general, are the missing links to the evolution of this country. In this talk, I reference three brilliant female psychologists, who have done their own research on the benefits of engaging in self compassion to create a more compassionate world. In this talk I explore:
- The intergenerational trauma, oppression, and patriarchy that needs to be looked at and deeply felt.
- One of the only ways to heal is to feel our rage, fear, and anxiety...but to hold it compassionately and with presence.
- Most of us operate from the limbic part of the brain, which is a bottom up response of survival and reactivity.
- We need to learn how to have a top down response of self regulation, soothing, and pause from the frontal cortex.
- When we don't learn to sit with our feelings of vulnerability, we "bad other" other human beings.
- Becoming more compassionate to oneself and others is not about being weaker, passive, or complacent.
- As Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. says, "It's about engaging the soul force."
- We forget the amazing resilience of our ancestors and of life.
- Whenever the dominant strata of society feels threatened, which is predominantly white Christian male, they become more threatened, that dominant strata becomes more cruel, more hateful, and more violent, more punishing, and more oppressive.
- It’s contagious. We get angry and hateful towards those. We then react in aggressiveness.
- It perpetuates suffering and then we fall deeper and deeper into the dark ages.
- When others are caught in the shadow and unprocessed feelings their violence brings up our shadow.
- That hatred never ceases by hatred. But by love alone is healed.
- Practical tools and applications for self-compassion practices in your life.